What is Social Anxiety?
Social anxiety is where a person is nervous or uncomfortable in social situations. The fear is often one of doing something embarrassing, making a bad impression, or being judged negatively by others. Social anxiety may be specific or generalized. In the case of specific anxiety it is only triggered by one or two situations. These may be, for example, speaking in public or being interviewed for a job.
In the case or generalized social anxiety, almost any social situation can provoke anxiety. However, in all cases the anxiety does not arise in a vacuum, but is triggered either by being confronted with the situation or by thinking about it and anticipating it. Usually thinking about an upcoming situation is enough to create anxiety.
The response to these situations can include:-
The physiological and bodily changes of anxiety (See Table 1)
e.g. increased heart rate, dry mouth, sweating, gastrointestinal upset etc.
Worrying Thoughts (See Table 2)– these commonly involve a fretful anticipation of some disastrous or embarrassing consequence of engaging in a particular social interaction.
Avoidant Behavior. (See Table 3) Often people who exhibit shyness or social anxiety often avoid situations in which they may become anxious. Sometimes the avoidance is obvious but at other times there may be more subtle forms of avoidance. These include using alcohol or drugs to mask anxiety, staying in the kitchen to help out at the party, wearing a turtleneck or a lot of makeup to hide possible blushing.
Table I – Physical Feelings Associated with Social Anxiety
- Racing or pounding heart
- Breathlessness or feelings of being smothered
- Dizziness or lightheadedness
- Difficulty swallowing, choking feelings, or a “lump” in the throat
- Quivering or shakiness (e.g., in the hands, knees, lips, or whole body)
- Blushing
- Nausea, diarrhea, or “butterflies” in the stomach
- Excessive sweating
- Trembling or quavering voice
- Tearfulness, crying
- Nervous laughter, smiling
- Poor concentration (e.g., forgetting what you are trying to say)
- Blurred vision
- Numbness and tingling sensations
- Feelings of unreality or being detached
- Tightness or weakness in the muscles (e.g., wobbly legs, sore neck)
- Chest pain or tightness in chest muscles
- Dry mouth
- Hot flushes or chills
Table II – Examples of Distorted Thinking
- It is important that everybody like me
- If my boss doesn’t like me, I will be fired
- If I give a presentation, I will make a fool of myself
- If I make a mistake, people will become angry with me
- People are untrustworthy and nasty
- People should always be interested in what I say
- People should not look at me the wrong way
- If I am not liked by a particular person, I am unlikable
- If someone rejects me, I deserve it
- It is awful to blush, shake, or sweat in front of others
- People can tell when I am anxious
- People find me unattractive
- If I speak to my boss, I will look incompetent
- I should be able to hide my anxiety symptoms
- If my hands shake at work, it will be a disaster
- Anxiety is a sign of weakness
- I should not appear anxious
- If I am too anxious, I will not be able to speak
Table III – Examples of Avoidant Behaviors
| Avoidant Behavior | Examples |
| Refusing to Enter the Situation | Turning down an invitation to a party |
| Never answering questions in class | |
| Making an excuse not to have dinner with a friend | |
| Escaping from the Situation | Always arriving late for meetings and leaving early to avoid making “small talk” |
| Offering to help with the dishes at a party to avoid talking to the guests | |
|
Making an excuse to get off the telephone with a friend or coworker |
|
| Subtle Avoidance Behaviors | Distracting yourself from your anxious thoughts |
| Keeping the room dark during your presentations to keep the audience focused on the slides rather than on you | |
| Filling out a check before arriving at store to avoid writing in front of others | |
| Avoiding eye contact and speaking very softly when conversing with others | |
| Overprotective Behaviors | Wearing makeup and a turtleneck sweater to hide your blushing |
| Always attending the holiday office party with a close friend, spouse, other safe person even though your coworkers tend to attend alone | |
| Always arriving early for meetings to ensure that it will not be necessary to enter the room after everyone else is already seated | |
| Drug or Alcohol Use | Having a couple of glasses of wine before meeting another person for a date |
Examples of Social Situations
Interpersonal Situations
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Asking someone out on a date
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Initiating or maintaining a conversation
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Going to a party
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Having friends over for dinner
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Meeting new people
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Talking on the telephone
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Expressing a personal opinion
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Having a job interview
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Being assertive (e.g., asking someone else to change their behavior)
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Returning an item to a store
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Sending back food in a restaurant
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Making eye contact
Performance Situations
- Public speaking
- Speaking in meetings
- Playing sports or participating in aerobics
- Getting married
- Performing music or acting on a stage
- Eating or drinking in front of others
- Using public bathrooms with others in the room
- Writing with others watching (e.g., filling out a form)
- Making a mistake in public (e.g., falling down, dropping your keys, etc.)
- Walking or jogging in a public place (e.g., on a busy street)
- Introducing yourself (e.g., saying your name) in front of a group
- Shopping in a busy store
